It's September 3rd. So much has changed over the summer, but right now my thoughts are spinning around the idea of marriage... what it means and how to do it 'right,' if there is such a thing.
My son was married on Saturday, September 1st, to a fantastic, loving young woman. She is the perfect match for him. She pulls him out of what I would consider his social comfort zone and has given him a more rounded, exciting life. When I see him look at her, I know he loves her and I can see in her eyes how much she loves him.
So I started thinking about what advice I could share and the one thing that comes to me over and over again, is pretty simple in theory. It's to not ignore the cracks. Everyone knows a marriage should start with a pretty solid foundation. That foundation is typically friendship.
Most homeowners know foundations get cracks. And what happens with a crack that's not taken care of? Sometimes, nothing at all... a little seepage here and there, but maybe nothing to be concerned about. That's if you're lucky. Many times, however, the crack gets larger and as that crack gets larger, the easier it becomes for something to leak out or come in. Eventually the crack can become so large, it destroys the foundation.
Therefore, my advice is... don't neglect the cracks. Do whatever it takes to repair them, however many you find, and do it as often as needed. Don't pretend, just because you're not looking at them everyday, that they aren't there or will go away on their own. Examine the crack, fix the crack and keep that foundation strong!
Monday, September 3, 2018
Thursday, March 8, 2018
ASEA for cellular health... from the inside out!
As some of you know, I have struggled with auto immune conditions, inflammation and more for over 20 years. I try not to identify with them, however, they ARE a part of the driving force guiding me to live a life geared toward better health. I look for quality ingredients in the foods I eat, quality supplements and quality essential oils. These are my mainstays to feeling GOOD, not just better. Add in gentle exercise, combined with energy medicine, and most days I'm on top of the world. I can honestly say I feel better in my 50's than I did in my 30's.
That said, the reason I'm writing this is to introduce you to a special product I've been using, something different than anything else I've come across. For the past year I've been using a supplemental drink, called ASEA. It was recommended by my exceptional chiropractor, Dr. Brad Shallow. This guy knows his stuff and because he's helped me in so many ways since I've lived in Florida, when he strongly recommended I take ASEA, I decided I would try it.
What is ASEA you ask? Well, it's a redox supplement that enables your cells to communicate with each other. Let's repeat that... it enables your cells to communicate with each other! This communication improves the overall function of the cells. ASEA Redox Supplement restores the exact kind of redox signaling molecules you create yourself, but in the quantities you need for optimum health. You can read more info here.
I started on the recommended amount, drinking 2 ounces, twice daily, and have been taking it for over a year. Although I don't have a memory of thinking "WOW, this stuff really works," I now have an experience of WOW, my body is really off since I stopped using it. You see, I was getting ready to move in February and I was in between places, not really knowing where I was going to be, so I didn't reorder when my supply ran out. BIG MISTAKE! Every day over the past three weeks I could feel my body not working and feeling as well as it had. I'm more tired, my brain is foggy again, my eyesight is off, and I ache. It's that all over, fibromyalgia achiness that I haven't had in a long while now. And on top of that, my hot flashes have returned. But I didn't put two and two together until I attended an ASEA meeting at the end of last month.
Dr. Shallow told me about a meeting with Dr. Silverman, (DPM) who is on the board of ASEA. He was coming to DeLand to talk about this very unique product. I really hadn't looked into the backstory of ASEA or even how it works, so I was curious to hear what Dr. Silverman had to say. After the talk, I came home and signed up as an Associate. I am impressed with the company, the product and I knew I'd be telling others about ASEA and how redox signaling has become a breakthrough in cellular health. Seriously... who doesn't want their cells to function properly and communicate with each other?
As an Associate, I have a website which includes links to information about ASEA, the company and also about RENU 28, an intensive Redox Formula for skin and body care. If you want to try ASEA for yourself, I'd appreciate your using my link to order through, which will, in turn, help me. If you're interested in knowing more about becoming an Associate and generating a little residual income of your own, please let me know because helping each other, helps us all.
Just a little extra about the company...
Although ASEA is classified as a supplement, it is produced in an FDA-registered, NSF-certified facility and is certified by an independent third-party lab that it does, indeed, contain active redox signaling molecules.
Ready to learn more? Please go to my ASEA page, here, or contact me at 630-951-8959.
That said, the reason I'm writing this is to introduce you to a special product I've been using, something different than anything else I've come across. For the past year I've been using a supplemental drink, called ASEA. It was recommended by my exceptional chiropractor, Dr. Brad Shallow. This guy knows his stuff and because he's helped me in so many ways since I've lived in Florida, when he strongly recommended I take ASEA, I decided I would try it.
What is ASEA you ask? Well, it's a redox supplement that enables your cells to communicate with each other. Let's repeat that... it enables your cells to communicate with each other! This communication improves the overall function of the cells. ASEA Redox Supplement restores the exact kind of redox signaling molecules you create yourself, but in the quantities you need for optimum health. You can read more info here.
I started on the recommended amount, drinking 2 ounces, twice daily, and have been taking it for over a year. Although I don't have a memory of thinking "WOW, this stuff really works," I now have an experience of WOW, my body is really off since I stopped using it. You see, I was getting ready to move in February and I was in between places, not really knowing where I was going to be, so I didn't reorder when my supply ran out. BIG MISTAKE! Every day over the past three weeks I could feel my body not working and feeling as well as it had. I'm more tired, my brain is foggy again, my eyesight is off, and I ache. It's that all over, fibromyalgia achiness that I haven't had in a long while now. And on top of that, my hot flashes have returned. But I didn't put two and two together until I attended an ASEA meeting at the end of last month.
Dr. Shallow told me about a meeting with Dr. Silverman, (DPM) who is on the board of ASEA. He was coming to DeLand to talk about this very unique product. I really hadn't looked into the backstory of ASEA or even how it works, so I was curious to hear what Dr. Silverman had to say. After the talk, I came home and signed up as an Associate. I am impressed with the company, the product and I knew I'd be telling others about ASEA and how redox signaling has become a breakthrough in cellular health. Seriously... who doesn't want their cells to function properly and communicate with each other?
As an Associate, I have a website which includes links to information about ASEA, the company and also about RENU 28, an intensive Redox Formula for skin and body care. If you want to try ASEA for yourself, I'd appreciate your using my link to order through, which will, in turn, help me. If you're interested in knowing more about becoming an Associate and generating a little residual income of your own, please let me know because helping each other, helps us all.
Just a little extra about the company...
Although ASEA is classified as a supplement, it is produced in an FDA-registered, NSF-certified facility and is certified by an independent third-party lab that it does, indeed, contain active redox signaling molecules.
Ready to learn more? Please go to my ASEA page, here, or contact me at 630-951-8959.
Tuesday, October 10, 2017
Thoughts around my trip to Chicago & Saratoga Springs
After close to five months away, I'm finally back to my home in Florida. A lot has happened since I left at the end of April. I became a grandmother for the first time, watching with awe and amazement as my daughter transitioned into her new role as Mom. As much as I love that little baby and found it hard to take my eyes off her, seeing my daughter as a mother was truly my greatest joy. I can't even write this without tearing up. It touched my heart in a way I was not prepared for.As families do, my family continues to change and grow. My oldest son will be getting married in September; my middle daughter finished her graduate degree and moved to Madison, WI, with her boyfriend; my youngest son will graduate from college this year and my fourth-born... well, she's doing great, working and trying to figure out what's next. They are all incredible young people and I loved my time with them.
After the days turned into months, I reluctantly left the Chicago area. It was the end of August and as we said our good byes, I was pretty sure I'd be moving back there sometime in the near future.
I was initially planning to travel back to Florida from Chicago but the sudden passing of a very healthy friend, Linda (in Florida), sent me into a tail spin. I felt that instead of driving to Florida, I needed to drive to Saratoga Springs, NY, to spend time with my mother, sister, brother, and close friends. It was one of those times when I was hit over the head (or in the heart) and reminded how quickly life can change. While in Saratoga, I spent time with most of the people I was hoping to see.
I was also able to spend time in nature, sitting by a lake, talking for hours with my cousin. I had a 'driving Miss Daisy" day with one of my closest friends, Susan, driving into the Adirondacks and stopping at beautiful places along the way. On my final weekend there, I drove to my sisters in the Catskill Mountains. The peace and quiet of where she lives is something I rarely experience but definitely crave. It was hard to leave the mountain and her. With her there's a comfort level and honesty only felt with one other person... my sister from another mother. I could easily live in that area.
While in Saratoga my godson's son, "Lil Jeff," lost his 2 1/2 year battle with colon cancer. He was only 15. It happened on the weekend that Hurricane Irma hit Florida. It was an emotionally intense weekend as I had a friend riding out the storm in Naples, where the hurricane was going to hit land first. I was concerned for her, as well as my friends in other parts of Florida. I would have been back in Florida if I hadn't followed my inklings and driven to NY.
My mom has memory issues and is becoming more confused lately. It's been happening for years but I don't see it much since I don't live close by. My sister and her husband have taken on the responsibility of my mother, caring for her home and seeing to her needs. But I was there when Lil Jeff passed, and felt I was put exactly where I was needed. My mom was having a hard time remembering and continued to relive that first time she heard the news over and over again. I could tell by looking at her that it was taking its toll. Her eyes were sunken and she looked exhausted, but trying to remember something so sad was exhausting. My heart hurt for her, and it hurt for my godson, his family and my cousin, Lil Jeff's grandfather.
When my friend, Linda, passed, I realized that much of what I was looking forward to doing when I returned to Florida included her. I was thinking about classes I'd take, bike rides, pickleball, good conversations... simply, a nice friendship. It was now gone. By going to New York I was able to avoid the now black hole that I knew used to be her bright place. Coincidentally, Linda's Celebration of Life was taking place in Buffalo, NY, the same weekend as the Hurricane and Lil Jeff's passing.
It's now 7,650 miles later and I'm back in Florida. Hurricane Irma passed through the state. Some damage is evident in my area but nothing happened to my home. We were fortunate here.
I look back over these past five months and I see how guided and cared for I was. I was given exactly what I needed at every turn or was in a place to help and support others as it was needed.
When I was stubbornly trying to avoid a hip replacement (even though I could barely walk) an incorrect diagnosis on an MRI kicked me in the butt and sent me to a surgeon. The date of the surgery and all the pre-op appointments fell into place, as I was booked into appointments available only by recent cancellations. The surgeon was one of the best in the area and my surgery was very successful. My kids and friends helped out in many different ways.
During that time, I was given a house to live in for three months... fully furnished with a bi-weekly cleaning service and yard care. This allowed me to recover from the hip surgery, spend ample time with all my kiddos and my new grandchild, and to heal on many other levels. Yes, there really are earth angels.
I was guided to NY, to be with my Mom and friends. I checked in with myself over and over to see what felt right and when I needed to move on. At one point, I wondered if I was ever going to get back to Florida. But, the right time did arrive and now I'm sitting on my sofa in my own home... thinking, remembering, releasing.
I've realized that I needed these past 3 years in Florida to heal. Having spent four months back in the Chicago area, in the town I lived for 27 years, I can see how far I've come. It may sound selfish, but I needed time to find myself, apart from my family. To figure out who I am and what I enjoy; to regain confidence that was lost having been an at-home mother in a 25-year marriage.
I believe I'm able to go back there now and rejoin the family system in its new form. I probably won't be as physically close to my kids as I'd like, but I'll be an easy drive away and, hopefully, living in an area that is peaceful yet vibrant. Plus, I'll be a little closer to my Mom and sister. It's important now to get closer to my family. Ebb and flow is what comes to mind.
I feel very grateful and have faith that just as I was cared for and guided over the last five months, the next part of my journey will also be the same. It will unfold as it needs to. I will find myself where I belong, doing what I need to do... for myself and others.
9-25-17
Tuesday, July 25, 2017
How much stuff can I live without? Or how little can I live with?
I was given a fully furnished home for my stay in the Chicago area after Amy had the baby and I had hip replacement surgery. When I left in April to drive to Chicago, I didn't know how long I'd stay. I thought maybe I'd go to New York and spend time with my mom and then head back to Florida. I had to pack the car for Amy's baby shower and items for my time away. I packed some really odd things.
I brought my bathroom scale with me. I packed oracle cards, runes, ear plugs, exercise rollers, Melt Method balls, essential oils and a number of books and cookbooks. I have basic art supplies - my art journal, some pencils and a few paints. I have a suitcase worth of clothes and another of shoes. While here I purchased a portable stationary bike for exercise, a coffee maker and a few more art supplies.
Basically all I have with me of personal value fits in the back of my Subaru and that realization both surprised and intrigues me.
How much can I actually live without?
With each move I've made, I was able to let go of more attachments, but I still have a two bedroom, two bath house with every closet filled to capacity. I also have a two car garage that has room for my car, but the rest of it is full. I have two bicycles, a unicycle, lawn equipment (even though I have a lawn service), a saw, etc. I have an entire double closet full of art supplies or old art renderings/photography.
The only thing I'm missing since I've been here is my bed, food processor (which I almost brought with me), bicycle, and my art supplies, as well as the space to spread out and create.
How little can I live with? It might be time to purge some more.
I brought my bathroom scale with me. I packed oracle cards, runes, ear plugs, exercise rollers, Melt Method balls, essential oils and a number of books and cookbooks. I have basic art supplies - my art journal, some pencils and a few paints. I have a suitcase worth of clothes and another of shoes. While here I purchased a portable stationary bike for exercise, a coffee maker and a few more art supplies.
Basically all I have with me of personal value fits in the back of my Subaru and that realization both surprised and intrigues me.
How much can I actually live without?
With each move I've made, I was able to let go of more attachments, but I still have a two bedroom, two bath house with every closet filled to capacity. I also have a two car garage that has room for my car, but the rest of it is full. I have two bicycles, a unicycle, lawn equipment (even though I have a lawn service), a saw, etc. I have an entire double closet full of art supplies or old art renderings/photography.
The only thing I'm missing since I've been here is my bed, food processor (which I almost brought with me), bicycle, and my art supplies, as well as the space to spread out and create.
How little can I live with? It might be time to purge some more.
The Universe provides and continues to amaze me
As I sat in that 'in between' place of not knowing where I would stay after Amy has her baby AND waiting for the surgery and post op, it all fell into place. It seemed as soon as I let it go and started to relax about not knowing, it all dropped in.
A client of Amy offered her home for me to stay in after the baby was born. We asked about my renting her home for an additional couple of months but she offered it, free of charge, for as long as I needed. So now I sit in a charming home only ten minutes from my children. Could I have planned that? Absolutely not. I was envisioning sleeping in friends guest rooms or on their sofas, maybe traveling to NY or Wisconsin, or possibly finding a cheap room somewhere. None of that sat well with me, but I was willing to do whatever I had to. And then I'm offered a home for three months.
It became an interesting turn of events as I prepared for surgery. My surgeon friend was insistent on my going to one particular orthopedic surgeon, so I agreed. Because I was in such severe pain, her office was able to get me an appointment earlier than originally scheduled. The ortho surgeon looked at my MRI and new x-rays and said I didn't have AVN, as previously diagnosed. He then agreed to do the surgery and had a cancellation in two weeks at the hospital I wanted to be at. However, it would ONLY work out if I could get my Primary, Rheumatologist and Dentist to sign off, and get the necessary blood work done within the week.
I couldn't believe how it all fell into place. These doctors are usually booked out 3 months. I haven't seen any of them in almost 3 years, yet when I called, I was able to get in within that week. Because of that, I was able to have the surgery before my initial consult was originally scheduled. The healing was incredible. I went from a pain level of 8-11 pre op to a pain level of 1-3 immediately after surgery. I was walking up stairs on the second day and drove to Wisconsin on day 10. I never used a walker and only used a cane to walk any distance within the first ten days. I quickly weaned off pain meds and at this point am only taking an anti inflammatory. By the end of the first week, I barely had a limp. I am so very grateful for everyone that came together to make my surgery, healing and recovery a success. What an incredible support group I have! I feel I have my life back!!!
It's been an interesting time, these past few months. A couple of close friends are in the process of moving this week. Big changes for them both. One will settle in for the next few years, the other is moving to a temporary apartment until she makes a huge move to the west coast next year. Both are purging and ready to start new... fresh. Another friend in Wisconsin is unpacking her new place and allowing her life to come together in a new way. Changes, fear, joy, relief... that's what's in the air. A total reboot!
I'm caught in that in between once again.
I truly love my little house, neighborhood and historic downtown area in my Florida location. I never thought I'd ever live in Florida, yet there I am and loving it. BUT... it is far away from my family. Now I have a new little grand daughter who I miss when I'm away from her for a couple of days.
And not only the baby, but I LOVE watching Amy grow into her role as a mother. She is amazing in every way and it brings me such joy to spend time with them.
Although I have spent the most time with Amy, because of the baby and because she's home, I truly appreciate the time I've had with ALL my kids. I see the girls more than the boys, but it's still been great! I have a good bunch of kiddos. And when they're all together, it's a blast.
So, I find myself dreaming of an area closer to them that just maybe I'd be happy to live. Since Patti is moving to Madison, WI, it only makes sense to look somewhere between here and there. I have always enjoyed Wisconsin or rural Illinois. The lakes, countryside and small towns all feed my soul. BUT do I want to start over AGAIN? Do I want to spend winters dealing with snow and bad roads? Do I want to give up the long wonderful weather that Florida winters provide? And... will I still be too far away from them to enjoy impromptu family time and all it offers? Or will the distance be ok? Will it be close enough, yet far enough, to not feel like I'm excluded from something, yet be living in an area I enjoy?
Ideally, a way to be in both places sounds best to me. How do I keep my home in Florida and still be here for the summer and holidays? Or do I get a home in the Midwest and spend the winter in Florida? Financially, neither are reasonable thoughts, which makes me wonder what is going to open up? I never thought I'd be offered a home for three months, free of charge, with cleaning and lawn service included. Seriously... who gets that? Someone had my back, that's for sure.
A client of Amy offered her home for me to stay in after the baby was born. We asked about my renting her home for an additional couple of months but she offered it, free of charge, for as long as I needed. So now I sit in a charming home only ten minutes from my children. Could I have planned that? Absolutely not. I was envisioning sleeping in friends guest rooms or on their sofas, maybe traveling to NY or Wisconsin, or possibly finding a cheap room somewhere. None of that sat well with me, but I was willing to do whatever I had to. And then I'm offered a home for three months.
It became an interesting turn of events as I prepared for surgery. My surgeon friend was insistent on my going to one particular orthopedic surgeon, so I agreed. Because I was in such severe pain, her office was able to get me an appointment earlier than originally scheduled. The ortho surgeon looked at my MRI and new x-rays and said I didn't have AVN, as previously diagnosed. He then agreed to do the surgery and had a cancellation in two weeks at the hospital I wanted to be at. However, it would ONLY work out if I could get my Primary, Rheumatologist and Dentist to sign off, and get the necessary blood work done within the week.
I couldn't believe how it all fell into place. These doctors are usually booked out 3 months. I haven't seen any of them in almost 3 years, yet when I called, I was able to get in within that week. Because of that, I was able to have the surgery before my initial consult was originally scheduled. The healing was incredible. I went from a pain level of 8-11 pre op to a pain level of 1-3 immediately after surgery. I was walking up stairs on the second day and drove to Wisconsin on day 10. I never used a walker and only used a cane to walk any distance within the first ten days. I quickly weaned off pain meds and at this point am only taking an anti inflammatory. By the end of the first week, I barely had a limp. I am so very grateful for everyone that came together to make my surgery, healing and recovery a success. What an incredible support group I have! I feel I have my life back!!!
--------------------------------------
A prior writing...
A prior writing...
It's been an interesting time, these past few months. A couple of close friends are in the process of moving this week. Big changes for them both. One will settle in for the next few years, the other is moving to a temporary apartment until she makes a huge move to the west coast next year. Both are purging and ready to start new... fresh. Another friend in Wisconsin is unpacking her new place and allowing her life to come together in a new way. Changes, fear, joy, relief... that's what's in the air. A total reboot!
I'm caught in that in between once again.
I truly love my little house, neighborhood and historic downtown area in my Florida location. I never thought I'd ever live in Florida, yet there I am and loving it. BUT... it is far away from my family. Now I have a new little grand daughter who I miss when I'm away from her for a couple of days.
And not only the baby, but I LOVE watching Amy grow into her role as a mother. She is amazing in every way and it brings me such joy to spend time with them.
Although I have spent the most time with Amy, because of the baby and because she's home, I truly appreciate the time I've had with ALL my kids. I see the girls more than the boys, but it's still been great! I have a good bunch of kiddos. And when they're all together, it's a blast.
So, I find myself dreaming of an area closer to them that just maybe I'd be happy to live. Since Patti is moving to Madison, WI, it only makes sense to look somewhere between here and there. I have always enjoyed Wisconsin or rural Illinois. The lakes, countryside and small towns all feed my soul. BUT do I want to start over AGAIN? Do I want to spend winters dealing with snow and bad roads? Do I want to give up the long wonderful weather that Florida winters provide? And... will I still be too far away from them to enjoy impromptu family time and all it offers? Or will the distance be ok? Will it be close enough, yet far enough, to not feel like I'm excluded from something, yet be living in an area I enjoy?
Ideally, a way to be in both places sounds best to me. How do I keep my home in Florida and still be here for the summer and holidays? Or do I get a home in the Midwest and spend the winter in Florida? Financially, neither are reasonable thoughts, which makes me wonder what is going to open up? I never thought I'd be offered a home for three months, free of charge, with cleaning and lawn service included. Seriously... who gets that? Someone had my back, that's for sure.
Saturday, May 27, 2017
The in between
5/27/17 - Memorial Day Weekend
I'm sitting at Amy's. I've been here since May 2nd when I came in to throw her a baby shower. Her body is working it's magic and she's definitely getting ready... I'm thinking it will be this weekend.
I look at her and smile. That big round baby belly stretched out in front of her, knowing her life will forever be changed. It's exciting... I'm excited. I'm going to be a grandma (or Grand Ma Ma... as I tease her.)
I wish I were in better shape physically as she enters this challenging time, but I'm not. Seven months post op and I'm no better than I was. Actually, my bones are worse. I've had another MRI, and that one shows I have Avascular Necrosis. The head of the femur has not been getting blood, so it has started to collapse. A hip surgery is inevitable. I also have extensive marrow edema (severe synovitis) and an insufficiency fracture of the superior acetabulum. An insufficiency fracture means a fracture caused by normal stress exerted on a weakened bone.
I am concerned about the underlying issues. How did I go from bone marrow edema to a collapsed femoral head in five months time? It makes me wonder if something is happening to other bones in my body? Do I need to have an MRI on those too?
First things first... My orthopedic surgeon friend recommended/insisted on my seeing Dr. Michael Stover (Northwestern Hospital). I can't get in to see him until June 30th... a month away. So it looks like I'll be here for a while.
I keep telling myself to relax into the idea. I'll have more time to spend with my little grandbaby. I don't know what Amy's needs will be and maybe she'll appreciate having me around, if for nothing other than moral support. I know I missed my mother as I started my family.
So I sit in between. In between not being a grandmother and being a grandmother. I sit in between the pain - not being able to walk and knowing that the eventual surgery will allow movement again. I'm also in between spaces. It's only a matter of days before I have to leave Amy's.
I do not want to burden her and Johnny by having me here, so I'm hoping the right space to be in opens up. I'm going to need to find a place for two weeks after the baby comes so they can have their new parent time... and then, again, after surgery. I'm surprised at how well I'm doing not knowing where my head will be resting. I love my private space, but I'm not freaking out about not having it. As I wrote this the thought of going to NY came back to me.
It might work out that I go to NY after the baby comes and then get back here for my doctors appointment at the end of June. That will give her a month with her little one.
Maybe. I'm counting on it all unfolding in a way that works for us all.
In the meantime... I'M GOING TO BE A GRAND MA MA!!!! Soooo very exciting.
I'm sitting at Amy's. I've been here since May 2nd when I came in to throw her a baby shower. Her body is working it's magic and she's definitely getting ready... I'm thinking it will be this weekend.
I look at her and smile. That big round baby belly stretched out in front of her, knowing her life will forever be changed. It's exciting... I'm excited. I'm going to be a grandma (or Grand Ma Ma... as I tease her.)
I wish I were in better shape physically as she enters this challenging time, but I'm not. Seven months post op and I'm no better than I was. Actually, my bones are worse. I've had another MRI, and that one shows I have Avascular Necrosis. The head of the femur has not been getting blood, so it has started to collapse. A hip surgery is inevitable. I also have extensive marrow edema (severe synovitis) and an insufficiency fracture of the superior acetabulum. An insufficiency fracture means a fracture caused by normal stress exerted on a weakened bone.
I am concerned about the underlying issues. How did I go from bone marrow edema to a collapsed femoral head in five months time? It makes me wonder if something is happening to other bones in my body? Do I need to have an MRI on those too?
First things first... My orthopedic surgeon friend recommended/insisted on my seeing Dr. Michael Stover (Northwestern Hospital). I can't get in to see him until June 30th... a month away. So it looks like I'll be here for a while.
I keep telling myself to relax into the idea. I'll have more time to spend with my little grandbaby. I don't know what Amy's needs will be and maybe she'll appreciate having me around, if for nothing other than moral support. I know I missed my mother as I started my family.
So I sit in between. In between not being a grandmother and being a grandmother. I sit in between the pain - not being able to walk and knowing that the eventual surgery will allow movement again. I'm also in between spaces. It's only a matter of days before I have to leave Amy's.
I do not want to burden her and Johnny by having me here, so I'm hoping the right space to be in opens up. I'm going to need to find a place for two weeks after the baby comes so they can have their new parent time... and then, again, after surgery. I'm surprised at how well I'm doing not knowing where my head will be resting. I love my private space, but I'm not freaking out about not having it. As I wrote this the thought of going to NY came back to me.
It might work out that I go to NY after the baby comes and then get back here for my doctors appointment at the end of June. That will give her a month with her little one.
Maybe. I'm counting on it all unfolding in a way that works for us all.
In the meantime... I'M GOING TO BE A GRAND MA MA!!!! Soooo very exciting.
Healing continues - February, 2017
Written in February, 2017
This healing journey I've embarked on continues to take me deeper and deeper into myself. I'm not sure how I got an email from Jennifer McLean's healing course, but I'm glad I did. I'm also glad I clicked on the link and started working in that energy. Such an incredible way to enlighten and shift all that is so stuck.
It's all internal. I've also started Art Journaling which is not entirely new to me, yet it is fresh and gives me a way to express the way I work - energy, words & art. I've also committed to a craving and observation exercise that I used to do. It's through Unity of Care and Tantra Maat.
Physically, I've hit it hard too. Chiropractic sessions with Dr. Shallow which include manual manipulation, high end laser and the PULSE mat have been incredibly helpful. They keep me on track and encourage me to continue with a healthy diet. I've added a Collagen Protein Shake to my morning, replacing eggs and toast.
I'm still a bit reclusive. In this time of perfect weather here in Florida, I've become a hermit. I have gone to the water a couple of times, but mostly I'm staying in. I can't walk far, so I'm not taking walks. I'm playing within my house, within my mind and emotions. My spiritual practice has become part of my morning routine and takes 1-2 hours to get through. I can do this because I have nothing but time right now. It's all ok.
I am staying away from people. There is so much negative energy and fear now that Donald Trump and his people are running the country. My stomach has been in a knot for over a week. My head is fuzzy and I can tell I just want to leave my body. But I'm staying in it the best I can - by mostly being alone or with people I consider safe.
All that is 'off' inside of me is coming to the surface. It's being seen, released ... healed... loved. It will be ok. I will be ok.
This healing journey I've embarked on continues to take me deeper and deeper into myself. I'm not sure how I got an email from Jennifer McLean's healing course, but I'm glad I did. I'm also glad I clicked on the link and started working in that energy. Such an incredible way to enlighten and shift all that is so stuck.
It's all internal. I've also started Art Journaling which is not entirely new to me, yet it is fresh and gives me a way to express the way I work - energy, words & art. I've also committed to a craving and observation exercise that I used to do. It's through Unity of Care and Tantra Maat.
Physically, I've hit it hard too. Chiropractic sessions with Dr. Shallow which include manual manipulation, high end laser and the PULSE mat have been incredibly helpful. They keep me on track and encourage me to continue with a healthy diet. I've added a Collagen Protein Shake to my morning, replacing eggs and toast.
I'm still a bit reclusive. In this time of perfect weather here in Florida, I've become a hermit. I have gone to the water a couple of times, but mostly I'm staying in. I can't walk far, so I'm not taking walks. I'm playing within my house, within my mind and emotions. My spiritual practice has become part of my morning routine and takes 1-2 hours to get through. I can do this because I have nothing but time right now. It's all ok.
I am staying away from people. There is so much negative energy and fear now that Donald Trump and his people are running the country. My stomach has been in a knot for over a week. My head is fuzzy and I can tell I just want to leave my body. But I'm staying in it the best I can - by mostly being alone or with people I consider safe.
All that is 'off' inside of me is coming to the surface. It's being seen, released ... healed... loved. It will be ok. I will be ok.
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